Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Cura (insert fake Latin sounding word here)
WARNING: This blog may contain information and words that may be sensitive to some readers. Viewer discrestion is advised.
In the wise words of Peter Griffin..that means you know it's good.
So the Marquette Tribune, possibly the finest most distinguised newspaper to use for lining the liter box, has sparked a recent debate in the Viewpoints section. Thats where students write in what they're pissed off about. Kinda like a blog, but someone who is so whinny they want everyone to see it. Where here when I whine about stuff i know only Ryan Packer or Aaron Morey see it (obligatory Aaron Morey reference)
But the following is a viewpoint that inspired me and Aaron Morey to pen a response. This is where things get a little awkward especially for guys who don't even know how to pronounce this word let alone why its health would be important to my family.:
Cura vaginalis
By Hannah Yaritz
CATHOLIC PEOPLE HAVE SEX. THERE. I SAID IT. WOMEN HAVE VAGINAS. MEN HAVE PENISES. THESE ARE FACTS, I AM NOT LYING, AND I AM NOT ASHAMED TO MAKE THESE STATEMENTS. WHAT I AM ASHAMED OF IS ATTENDING A UNIVERSITY THAT DOES NOT BELIEVE THESE THINGS TO BE TRUE. OR IF THEY DO, THEY DO A GOOD JOB OF COVERING IT UP. — Vaginas and penises are important parts of our body: They give us pleasure and create new life. They need to be cared for and they need to remain healthy, so we as humans are healthy. The simplest way to keep these parts healthy is to protect them from harm. There are all sorts of forms of protection. We wear underwear to protect our vaginas and penises from being chafed and to prevent germs from getting inside of us. We wear protective gear playing sports to guard us from injury. We also use condoms while performing sexual actions. Condoms protect us from infections that could harm us and our partners. They also protect against unwanted pregnancies. Oral contraceptives protect women from unwanted pregnancies as well. They do a number of other things to keep women healthy, but the main purpose is to prevent unwanted pregnancies which could potentially lead to an unhealthy relationship with a partner, a child who is not appreciated or an abortion.
Now this may seem very obvious to most of us, but I am not certain it is clear to the people who make decisions for Marquette. Director of Student Health Services Dana Mills said in a Sept. 26 Tribune article, Condom maker..., "Marquette provides an atmosphere where the health and well-being of the total person — physical, mental, intellectual and spiritual — is encouraged and promoted." She is wrong. The university is not doing a good job caring for the whole person. My vagina is part of me and it needs to be protected. It needs to be healthy and it needs to remain that way. It needs to remain that way for the relationships that I have with my family, my future family, my friends and for those who don't even know me. Why? Because my vagina is part of me. It defines who I am as a person and who I am going to become. If I want to make a difference in the lives of others, to be a woman for others, I need my vagina to remain healthy. My peers need their vaginas and penises to remain healthy for the same reasons.
Marquette is a Catholic, Jesuit university, they must abide by those rules. I know, we all know. However, it is very ignorant of them to not take into consideration that their fellow Catholics are having sex and are being put in harm's way because the university fails to support them by means of protection. The very least they can do is to tell us where we can go to receive the help we need since they cannot help us themselves, and Marquette fails to do that. In my eyes, Marquette has failed.
Yaritz is a junior in the College of Communication.
Now this is all well and good. But I think Yaritz missed a more critical health problem on campus. So here is myself and Aaron Morey's response.
Cura nasalis: Marquette stinks at nasal hygeine
By Thomas Nelson
Marquette students have boogers. There, I said it. We all get them. What do we do with them? Some scratch them. Others pick them discreetly with Kleenex. Still others brazenly dive in wrist-deep. I am one of those who dive right in.
I'm not ashamed of my choice (and I stress that it is my choice) of booger extraction technique. What I am ashamed of is how afraid my school is of discussing proper nasal hygiene. The nose can be a source of great aromatic pleasure. It must be well taken care of in order to continue providing the greatest possible olfactory experience. It needs protection.
On this point, Marquette frankly stinks. Milwaukee is an odorous city. Between breweries, tanneries, the river and the people smoking all around, there are many elements detracting from the simple daily pleasures of smell. The university also fails to educate the student body on where to obtain such basic needs as tissues. They are not in classrooms and they are not provided at residence halls. This can lead to chafing and unsanitary hand wiping. Some have even stooped to using rough, unforgiving toilet paper or paper towels.
I mean it quite literally when I say that this blows. Tissues can protect us against infections that can deeply affect us and those dear to us.
I plead with the university to reconsider its stance on nasal hygiene awareness. And I ask all readers to remember: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but never pick your friend's nose without proper protection.Nelson is a senior in the College of Arts & Sciences.
I don't want to get into a debate over the subject matter of the oringial article but its pretty clear she simply used the words "penis, sex, and vagina" to get the shock value out of it. So our response to her...well to make fun of it of course. It's what we do. The standards may have been lowerd by her viewpoint but Aaron Morey and I made sure they keep getting lower.
Ladies and Gentlemen take my advice, if your ever in a luncheon with three theology professors and they are discussing some of the work they have published, it is probably not a good idea to discuss your recently published article about boogers.
In the wise words of Peter Griffin..that means you know it's good.
So the Marquette Tribune, possibly the finest most distinguised newspaper to use for lining the liter box, has sparked a recent debate in the Viewpoints section. Thats where students write in what they're pissed off about. Kinda like a blog, but someone who is so whinny they want everyone to see it. Where here when I whine about stuff i know only Ryan Packer or Aaron Morey see it (obligatory Aaron Morey reference)
But the following is a viewpoint that inspired me and Aaron Morey to pen a response. This is where things get a little awkward especially for guys who don't even know how to pronounce this word let alone why its health would be important to my family.:
Cura vaginalis
By Hannah Yaritz
CATHOLIC PEOPLE HAVE SEX. THERE. I SAID IT. WOMEN HAVE VAGINAS. MEN HAVE PENISES. THESE ARE FACTS, I AM NOT LYING, AND I AM NOT ASHAMED TO MAKE THESE STATEMENTS. WHAT I AM ASHAMED OF IS ATTENDING A UNIVERSITY THAT DOES NOT BELIEVE THESE THINGS TO BE TRUE. OR IF THEY DO, THEY DO A GOOD JOB OF COVERING IT UP. — Vaginas and penises are important parts of our body: They give us pleasure and create new life. They need to be cared for and they need to remain healthy, so we as humans are healthy. The simplest way to keep these parts healthy is to protect them from harm. There are all sorts of forms of protection. We wear underwear to protect our vaginas and penises from being chafed and to prevent germs from getting inside of us. We wear protective gear playing sports to guard us from injury. We also use condoms while performing sexual actions. Condoms protect us from infections that could harm us and our partners. They also protect against unwanted pregnancies. Oral contraceptives protect women from unwanted pregnancies as well. They do a number of other things to keep women healthy, but the main purpose is to prevent unwanted pregnancies which could potentially lead to an unhealthy relationship with a partner, a child who is not appreciated or an abortion.
Now this may seem very obvious to most of us, but I am not certain it is clear to the people who make decisions for Marquette. Director of Student Health Services Dana Mills said in a Sept. 26 Tribune article, Condom maker..., "Marquette provides an atmosphere where the health and well-being of the total person — physical, mental, intellectual and spiritual — is encouraged and promoted." She is wrong. The university is not doing a good job caring for the whole person. My vagina is part of me and it needs to be protected. It needs to be healthy and it needs to remain that way. It needs to remain that way for the relationships that I have with my family, my future family, my friends and for those who don't even know me. Why? Because my vagina is part of me. It defines who I am as a person and who I am going to become. If I want to make a difference in the lives of others, to be a woman for others, I need my vagina to remain healthy. My peers need their vaginas and penises to remain healthy for the same reasons.
Marquette is a Catholic, Jesuit university, they must abide by those rules. I know, we all know. However, it is very ignorant of them to not take into consideration that their fellow Catholics are having sex and are being put in harm's way because the university fails to support them by means of protection. The very least they can do is to tell us where we can go to receive the help we need since they cannot help us themselves, and Marquette fails to do that. In my eyes, Marquette has failed.
Yaritz is a junior in the College of Communication.
Now this is all well and good. But I think Yaritz missed a more critical health problem on campus. So here is myself and Aaron Morey's response.
Cura nasalis: Marquette stinks at nasal hygeine
By Thomas Nelson
Marquette students have boogers. There, I said it. We all get them. What do we do with them? Some scratch them. Others pick them discreetly with Kleenex. Still others brazenly dive in wrist-deep. I am one of those who dive right in.
I'm not ashamed of my choice (and I stress that it is my choice) of booger extraction technique. What I am ashamed of is how afraid my school is of discussing proper nasal hygiene. The nose can be a source of great aromatic pleasure. It must be well taken care of in order to continue providing the greatest possible olfactory experience. It needs protection.
On this point, Marquette frankly stinks. Milwaukee is an odorous city. Between breweries, tanneries, the river and the people smoking all around, there are many elements detracting from the simple daily pleasures of smell. The university also fails to educate the student body on where to obtain such basic needs as tissues. They are not in classrooms and they are not provided at residence halls. This can lead to chafing and unsanitary hand wiping. Some have even stooped to using rough, unforgiving toilet paper or paper towels.
I mean it quite literally when I say that this blows. Tissues can protect us against infections that can deeply affect us and those dear to us.
I plead with the university to reconsider its stance on nasal hygiene awareness. And I ask all readers to remember: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but never pick your friend's nose without proper protection.Nelson is a senior in the College of Arts & Sciences.
I don't want to get into a debate over the subject matter of the oringial article but its pretty clear she simply used the words "penis, sex, and vagina" to get the shock value out of it. So our response to her...well to make fun of it of course. It's what we do. The standards may have been lowerd by her viewpoint but Aaron Morey and I made sure they keep getting lower.
Ladies and Gentlemen take my advice, if your ever in a luncheon with three theology professors and they are discussing some of the work they have published, it is probably not a good idea to discuss your recently published article about boogers.
# posted by The REAL Tommy @ 2:22 PM 
